I perform best under pressure. But it's got to be just the right amount of pressure: sufficient to motivate, not enough to crack. So in order to satisfy my inner Goldilocks, I have developed a sensitive barometer that compels me to relax (i.e. procrastinate) just so long, until the pressure is right and the conditions are optimal and then it's ALL SYSTEMS GO. I don't miss deadlines.
My master's thesis was like that too. I had an entire year to write it (just in terms of time-frame--I still had to work my low-wage, high-intensity jobs, write my papers for my other classes, work at church and participate in my zillions of activities). During the first several months I languished. I just couldn't get myself into the library to start finding sources, developing an outline, etc. After all, I reasoned, I still had 10 months left...now 8 months...now 6. Finally I begged my thesis advisor for some sub-deadlines. And then things went swimmingly. Or, you know, well enough. I still ended up working my tush off in the final 2 months, but that was ok since it was summer and my semester classes were finished. Plus, I was in high gear, finally, and had reached target pressure. I have not felt as productive before or since as I did during that summer. Basically I finished that whole book in eight weeks.
And why am I thinking about a long, obscure paper that I wrote three years ago? Well, my bosses travel a lot. They were gone all last week and leave again tomorrow evening. So I am stuck attempting to motivate myself intrinsically for weeks at a time. It is not my forte, even though some of the work I do is fascinating. I need deadlines! The boss-types always leave a long to-do list for me, which I appreciate, but I can usually gauge with a glance how long it will actually take me to finished the stuff on the list--I'm efficient--and it is hardly ever the whole time. I know what happens when I run out of responsibilities and can't invent any more: I deflate like a pricked balloon. Not enough pressure.
Tuesday, February 22, 2005
To Thine Ownself Be True
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3 comments:
I've noticed that, too. My guess, based on my experience with Jess, is that she either doesn't really know herself what it is that she does or that it's such an impressive, prestigious appointment that she's uncomfortable giving details (maybe she's got lackeys... that would be so cool. I wish I had lackeys).
Whenever people leave comments on my blog I get a copy e-mailed to me; is that not a standard blogspot feature? If so, then it certainly isn't dumb to leave comments on old posts - Jess'll still get to read them right away. If not, then you should turn that feature on, Jess; apparently people are commenting on old posts.
--Charlie
i know i get my comments e-mailed to me when someone comments (even on a post many months ago). so if you ever want to comment on my old posts, feel free!!
So, I will turn on that feature; it sounds like fun!
About my job: nope, I don't have any lackeys, I *am* the lackey. There are only four full-time employees in the office, so I do everything. My title is Project Assistant, and I put together itineraries, design brochures, communicate with group leaders, write grant proposals, hang out with groups that come to town, and (my personal favorite) occasionally go on the road with them too. It's a lot more sitting on my behind at my computer than I had imagined. Suffice it to say, it is far from my dream job, but I am doing the best I can to give it my all. I take heart in the fact that it won't go on forever.
The reason I don't talk much about my job here is that a.) it doesn't inspire too many blog-worthy thoughts, b.) I try to uphold some standards here and not depress you guys TOO much, and c.) since 8 units of our church headquarters have their fingers in this place, I have so many supervisors I can't count them all, and the odds of offending someone or getting myself in trouble are simply too high.
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